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Joke of the Day

"Mathematics works in mysterious ways...[possibly a joke just for UK redditors] 2x2= 4 1x1= 1 0x0= a small brown cube you put in a casserole."

"What do Disneyworld hookers sing? I ho I ho It's off to work I go"

"Whenever I'm alone, I like to dig a hole in my backyard, remove all my clothes, go inside that hole and pretend that I'm a carrot."

"If I had a dollar for every time I thought about you, I would start thinking about you."

"*whispers to businessman sleeping next to me on bus* Sleep tight precious angel"

"What did the french food critic say when he was given a savoury pancake? ""It's crepe"""

"What do you call 3 mexicans breaking into somewhere? Trespassers"

"It's cool to jump out of bed and realize you are already dressed to run to Walmart"

"Are you today's date? Because your 10/10."

"I'll tell you something about my wife She absolutely loves ~~cunilungas~~ ~~cunnilengus~~ ~~cunnelinges~~ cunnilingus Sorry, I always have trouble getting my tongue around it"