185257

Joke of the Day

"Tried to pick a booger off my phone screen. Ended up calling my mom, signing up for AOL and getting an online degree in refrigerator repair"

"What's brown and furry on the outside, soft moist and tastes good on the inside, begins with ""C"" and ends with ""T"", and has a ""U"" and an ""N"" in it? A coconut."

"I don't care how funny you are, if I don't like you, I won't laugh."

"How do you make a dead baby float? One glass of rootbeer and two scoops of dead baby."

"What sort of a car has your dad got? I can't remember the name. I think it starts with T. Really - Ours only starts with gas."

"Whats black and hurts when you get it thrown in your face? A Piano."

"I just started a new band called 'Blankets and Duvets' We've already been called the best cover band of all time"

"what is green and has wheels? A frog, I lied about the wheels."

"Why was Skrillex never in an orchestra? Because he would always drop the bass"

"[JOB INTERVIEW] {Don't let them know you're a tectonic plate} ""What would you say is your biggest fault?"" San Andreas?"