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Joke of the Day
"Someone stole my Microsoft Office and they're gonna pay! You have my word!"
Next Joke
"I've fallen in love with a pencil and we're getting married... I can't wait to introduce my parents to my bride 2B."
"Kanye running for president in 2020"
"Why don't blind people like to skydive? Because it scares the dog."
"What is the difference between Usian Bolt and Hitler ? Usian Bolt can finish a race."
"I've always wanted to play smooth jazz while making love... ...but apparently the bedroom is an inappropriate place for a drumkit."
"[Bad joke] How does a Marine like his eggs? Semper-fried! (Bring on the booings and the beatings)"
"Why did America remove the ""u"" from ""colour""? Because fuck u that's why"
"[Me, watching my murderer wipe down everything as I'm dying]: ""Oh, you don't have to do that, don't worry about it."""
"What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Beer nuts are $3.99 and deer nuts are under a buck."