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Joke of the Day
"*pokes forehead* Is this thing on ?"
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"I would put a webcam in my shower to make extra money, but I would hate having to only sing public domain songs."
"How many hippies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Hippies don't screw in lightbulbs, they screw in dirty sleeping bags."
"I overheard my neighbor tell someone on the phone that I was creepy. I was so mad I almost crawled out from under the bed & confronted her."
"The Pope is resigning. He will soon be known as Ex-Benedict."
"Knock knock Who's there? A broken Pencil. A broken Pencil who? ..... Never mind its pointless"
"Why was the comic book series depressed? Because it had too many issues."
"What is the flattest surface to iron your jeans on? ...a white girl's ass! (I AM a white girl, BTW, so don't start with me about racism)."
"If you leave me a voice mail that asks me to call you back at my convenience you have no one to blame but yourself."
"Why should you always take two pairs of trousers when you play golf?.... ....In case you get a hole in one!"