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Joke of the Day

"I overheard my neighbor tell someone on the phone that I was creepy. I was so mad I almost crawled out from under the bed & confronted her."

"Everyday, millions of plants are killed by vegetarians. Help stop the violence. Eat a steak."

"How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 5 1 to hold the bulb and 4 to spin the ladder."

"How does Princess Leia masturbate? Hand Solo"

"A man goes to a doctor with a large, dirty toad on his head. The doctor asks, ""What seems to be the problem?"" And the toad replies, ""Hey, Doc, there's something stuck to my ass."""

"What is a moo hoo for a cow fight? A cattle battle!"

"The first and last person to LIKE this status are the sexiest people in the whole wide world!"

"Guys, they lied to us. Peach was never in any real danger and Mario and Bowser are buddies. I saw all of them hanging out and go-karting."

"looking for a great stand up comedy show? just watch the GOP debate"

"Did you hear about the nation's best farmer? He's out standing in his field."