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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the overweight man who took up horse riding as exercise? The horse lost 15 pounds in a week!"

"What do you say to a motivated ghost? That's the spirit!"

"Did you hear what happened when Oedipus got flu? He became one sick mother fucker."

"London held a monocle convention for high class members of society... ... it was a respectable spectacle spectacle."

"As an organ donor I wonder if there's some box I can check that might prevent my organs from keeping Dick Cheney alive?"

"""911? Yes I need to report an incident"" ""What is it mam?"" ""THIS. GIRL. IS. ON. FIRE!"" ""Getting real tired of this crap, Alicia."""

"Are black men becoming an endangered species? No! Endangered species are protected by the law. -Chris Rock"

"My penis was in the guinness book of world records! And then the librarian told me to take it out"

"Two men walk into a bar. The first man is okay, but the other suffered a terrible head injury."

"Have you seen the new ticket prices for Alton Towers? Admission now costs an arm and a leg!"