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Joke of the Day
"Why was the dolphin keeper depressed? Because he had no porpoise."
Next Joke
"The Job Promotion Saudi Arabia just announced that someone was promoted be the new Oil Minister. That would make it a sheikh-up in the government."
"The woman who injected her 8-year old with Botox for beauty pageants has lost custody... The child didn't look surprised..."
"Why is your mom like a 360 noscope? Cuz I wouldn't hit that."
"How do you stop the neighbours kids from playing in your yard? Molest them"
"Donations Son: ""Dad, there is someone at the door to collect donations for a community swimming pool."" Father: ""Okay, give him a glass of water."""
"""Give it to me!! I'm so fucking wet!"" She screamed at me... ""Fuck off. This is MY umbrella."""
"What did the tuba say to the clarinet? Nothing, instruments don't talk."
"[phone call] Prank caller: Hi, I'd like to speak to Agood Boi Receptionist: who's Agood Boi? Prank caller: lol *tail goes nuts*"
"wife: ""just break it to him gently"" me: ""ok ill try"" [tucking son in bed] me: [opening story book] ""once upon a time your grandma's dead"""