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Joke of the Day

"What's the most positive thing in Africa? HIV"

"*gets to hell* [In earshot of Satan] I HATE ICE CREAM AND WATCHING TV, DAMN THAT WOULD BE REAL TORTURE FOR ME. OH AND BEER, I ALSO HATE BEER"

"Was driving with my dad the other day and he told me to get the map out of the glove box. Easy there Indiana Jones, I will just google it."

"What do you call poultry that glows in the dark? Chicken Kiev"

"On a scale of one to ten... ...you aren't getting a helpful measurement of your weight"

"We've heard that ignorance of maths is growing geometrically, whatever that means."

"I use to worked with an 82 year old. He always had extremely vulgar jokes. ""Hey Ken, got any new jokes?"" 'Nope, didn't go to Church this week.'"

"Who is this Rorschach guy? ... and why does he paint so many pictures of my parents fighting?"

"How did Aladdin die? Carpet bombing."

"I like my women like I like my beer. . . . . . cold, pale and without a head."