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Joke of the Day

"""How am I driving?"" No seriously, how did I get here. This isn't my car."

"Losing a husband can be hard: in my case it was almost impossible."

"If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? Testicles (though I'm sure you smarties already got it)."

"What do you call it when... You put a pillow on a stool? You call it a stool softener cheesiest joke I made up"

"Do you know how to avoid clickbait? Apparently not."

"What do you call an non alkaline Jewish family. Hasidic"

"How to kill 20 flies at once Slap an Ethiopian"

"Two blondes were on an escalator in the mall, when the power went out. They had to wait 3 hours to be rescued."

"[dark alley] Here's the $3 million, thanks again for this, be sure to send pictures. Kidnapper: Wait, don't you want your kids back?"

"Lady at the door asked if I'd found Jesus and I was all HOW IS HE MISSING, IT WAS YOUR DAY TO WATCH HIM. I don't think she'll be back."