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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between my neighbor and a necrophiliac? My neighbor fucked my wife yesterday, but the necrophiliac had to wait until today."

"What do you call a Trump supporter on a Friday night? A bad person"

"What did the letter F say when he became cool? Sup G?"

"Do you like oranges? Well I am bad at colloquialisms! How you like them oranges?!?!"

"I really wish every time I insulted someone, you suddenly hear that ""Oooohhh"" the audience does in sitcom shows."

"Hi, you've reached my voicemail. Send me a text like a normal person."

"Is Google male or female? Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion. ^^^nyuk, ^^^nyuk, ^^^nyuk"

"What would be Jesus' favorite gun? A Nail Gun."

"I tried explaining to someone why smoking weed is bad for you. To be blunt, I don't think they were paying much attention."

"Fred: I've added these figures ten times. Teacher: Good work! Fred: And here are my ten answers !"