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Joke of the Day

"wassup babe, im the reason Pregnancy-info .net disabled video embedding on their forums, how abuot giving me a nice kiss"

"Opened the bathroom cupboard and a bunch of feminine hygiene products fell out on me. It was a tampede."

"She said she was a free spirit. That's good. Wasn't sure how I'd pay for a spirit."

"I'm not sexist. Sexism is wrong. ...and being wrong is for women!"

"I found out I was dyslexic when I got invited to a toga party. I turned up as a goat."

"If you ever Google ""Gary Oldman"" For fuck sakes don't forget the ""r"" in Gary!!!"

"Waterboarding at Guantanamo Bay sounds super fun if you don't know what either of those things are."

"Ran into the apple store and used their bathroom .... iPeed"

"The Oscar Mayer Weinermobile got in a huge accident earlier. I never sausage a thing in my life. In frank, it was the wurst."

"Never throw a battery at someone You'll get charged with battery"