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Joke of the Day

"The Oscar Mayer Weinermobile got in a huge accident earlier. I never sausage a thing in my life. In frank, it was the wurst."

"If you think Lord of the Flies couldn't happen, you've clearly never seen a group of 7 year olds go after a pinata."

"Auctioneers are proof white guys could rap if they tried hard enough."

"Why did the Papal Palace fill up with kittens? Because the Pope was a cat-holic. Eh? Eh?"

"My friend asked me if goldfish suffer from depression i said ""Yes, but very briefly..."""

"""The actor who plays the villain in No Country For old Men was causing trouble in my bar last night."" ""Javier Bardem?"" ""No, but I will if he does it again."""

"How do you top a car? You tep on the brake, toopid."

"this is our son, Ryder Kade Ace Hypermasculine Overcompensation for Daddy's Fears Jones-Rendenburg"

"Abortion jokes aren't funny Cut it out."

"What do you call presents after you've opened them? Pasts"