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Joke of the Day
"What did the Mexican firefighter name his sons? Jose and Hose B"
Next Joke
"Show me a man who calls himself a vegan, ...and I'll show you a man who's trying to shag a vegan."
"Never underestimate mothers. They can turn ""mayhem"" into ""ma'am"" with one narrowed glance."
"Boss: Lunch meeting, let's go. Me: Do I have to? Boss: Free food and unlimited alcohol. Me: *moonwalks to the car*"
"Asked my wife if she would be my friend on FB again, she said no. She said my ""funny"" status updates are annoying. Therefore, I must conclude she loves me for my body..."
"What did the Zen Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything."
"I broke up with my girlfriend while we were jogging. I guess we had a good run."
"the word 'freelancer' originally came from medieval knights who would kill evildoers for the king and THEN NOT GET PAID FOR EIGHT MONTHS"
"""Sorry I didn't have a chance to clean up the place,"" I say as I wave dismissively at the chalk outline drawn on the living room floor."
"Help! I have food stuck in my throat! Haha, just choking!"