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Joke of the Day

"So, #Dorners ID was found in San Diego a week ago and then unmelted in the burned down cabin? sounds legit."

"Why did the vacuum get a raise? Because it sucked at its job."

"Life hack : Receive a wide assortment of yellow, orange, pink and red envelopes, free of charge, simply by not paying your bills."

"A guy is fingering his girlfriend... ...after a while, she starts to shift uncomfortably and says ""would you mind taking your ring off, please?"" The guy responds: ""what ring? That's my wristwatch!"""

"What's the difference between a lentil and a chickpea? Well, I wouldn't pay $200 to have a lentil on my face"

"Children with gay fathers as parents, I seriously sympathize you all It's not easy growing up with twice the dad jokes."

"I find myself addicted to this website just like my Father before me. Guess why that is? It's He*reddit*tary."

"My wife always cheats when we play board games Just last night, we were all playing Monopoly in the den and she was next-door fucking the neighbor."

"Steven Hawking nearly died last year. Luckily they sorted him out, they just switched him off and back on again."

"Did you hear about the farmer who tried to be a stand up comedian? His jokes weren't dairy funny."