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Joke of the Day

"I'm basically only good at three things: 1. Programming 2. Counting"

"Trying to give up cold turkey It's hard though when there is so much left over from Christmas."

"What do you call in-flight pilot training? Air conditioning."

"4th of july British people say that we as Americans go overboard with the 4th of July. When really the only thing that went overboard was their tea"

"A joke I made up What happened to wendy on her way to neverland? She peed her pants (read out loud)"

"Trump walks up to the mexican border and takes out his guitar. Anyway here's wonderwall."

"I only have sex with the lights off to prevent having to explain some of my tattoos."

"I've finally found something my girlfriend's bum doesn't look big in... ... The distance"

"Pet Cemetery 3: People get tired of resurrecting pets and relatives. Somebody buries dinosaur bones. Jurassic Park ensues."

"Note to self: ""rubber"" in the US does NOT mean ""eraser"". Bright side: my popularity in this office is at an all time high!"