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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes I'll send a tweet, notice a typo in it, delete it, re-send it, notice a different typo, unplug computer, change my name and move."

"i microwaved an apple to see what would happen but nothing happend and now i just have a really warm apple i don't know what i was expecting"

"There are three types of people in the world I hate. Racists, hypocrites and niggers."

"Im opening a DIY whorehouse. It's called ""Go fuck yourself""."

"So those numbers on sports jerseys are how many people each player has killed or what."

"Do you want a bag? A guy goes to the store to buy condoms. ""Do you want a bag?"" the cashier asks. ""No,"" the guy says, ""she's not that ugly."""

"Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food but no atmosphere."

"What do you call a woman that sets her bills on fire? Bernadette."

"100 years ago, 19 white men chasing down a black man was called the Klu Klux Klan Now it's called Formula 1 *Ku Kluk Klan"

"Why was the maths book sad? It had too many problems."