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Joke of the Day

"Do you want a bag? A guy goes to the store to buy condoms. ""Do you want a bag?"" the cashier asks. ""No,"" the guy says, ""she's not that ugly."""

"Trump is asked what his position on women's issues Trump replies ""Look, I know a lot of women and they all have issues"""

"Why was The Joker's US Passport application denied? Passports require proof of US citizenship and The Joker is a fictional character."

"I call my Missus's mimsy 'The Tardis' Not because it's bigger inside than I expected. It's just that she's had several dozen companions and at least one dog in there."

"A man walks into a bar..... His alcoholism is tearing his family apart."

"Who is the funniest American politician? Hillarious Clinton"

"CW: I spent all weekend raking leaves. Me: I don't rake. CW: Leaves will kill your grass! Me: I wonder how grass survived before humans."

"My wife calls my penis Nicolas Cage It's highly temperamental and tends to go off for no reason at all."

"the women in tampon commercials should switch places with the women in antidepressant commercials"

"Thanks to yesterday's chili, I can definitively tell you that there are 242 tiles in this bathroom stall."