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Joke of the Day

"Answered the door in my bath robe today... Funny place for a door."

"im a cat and i FREaking love turning potential energy into kinetic *pushes glass off table* your going to feed and keep me for some reason"

"Conjunctivitis.com Now that's a site for sore eyes."

"What's the difference between a Ritz and a lesbian? One is a snack cracker and the other is a crack snacker."

"Hey guys, I invented a new word! Plagiarism."

"I have a Ring of *Dad Jokes* It's well rounded but not too bright"

"An ad company friended me on facebook I guess you could say they wanted to ad me."

"Did you know George Washington is not on the 1$ bill? It's just a picture of him."

"Meet the parents"

"""WHAT THE HELL? WHERE'S THE OTHER, SMALLER VERSION OF THIS PERSON?""--Russian surgeon's 1st time cutting a patient open"