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Joke of the Day

"Obama: Hello Amer- *feels a tug on his suit coat* What Joe?? Biden: What color should the lion be? Yellow. Biden: I'm using green. *giggles*"

"With a name like ""Earl"", I'm more afraid this hurricane will get drunk and beat a pregnant woman, than I am that it will cause flooding."

"I never feel entirely comfortable leaving a music gig... It's disconcerting."

"My new band decided to name ourselves after Samsung.. We're the exploding notes."

"What do you call your ex-girlfriend in Maryland? Old bae."

"They should make toilet seats with a rumble pack to shake your turds loose."

"I got arrested for indecent exposure after my neighbour claimed he could see my penis. Maybe he should get a smaller postbox?"

"What do you call a blonde white guy with blue eyes who is an experienced soldier and who works with sick animals? A veteran Aryan."

"An Italian woman walks in on her husband giving a man a ""Golden Shower"". In her dumbfounded state, the shocked woman could only think of one thing to say. ""European!"""

"What did the guy in China say to the Chinese couple who finally got approved to adopt? Con-grab-ur-asians!!"