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Joke of the Day

"What sounds does a vicar's gun make? Pew! Pew!"

"Whats the difference between a black guy and a snow tire? A snow tire doesnt sing when you put chains on it."

"Hey Shakespeare, are you writing your next play in pentameter? Iamb."

"What do you call a Russian bovine covered in lichen? A Moss-cow"

"Everyone is entitled to my opinion."

"Advertising taught me that hair conditioner makes you move in slow motion."

"What the hell do you mean Buzzfeed isn't a reliable news source, it knew exactly what kind of pancake I'd be"

"What do you call a hipster with a vasectomy? A Fixie."

"Did you hear about the gay midget? He came out of the cabinet."

"What did they call it when NHL officials refused to allow a hamburger to play hockey in the league? Rink injustice!"