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Joke of the Day

"What are the Rolling Stones better at than the Bee gees? Stayin' Alive"

"Ladies: we're not fooled by your PMS trickery. I see how happy you are in those tampon commercials."

"Maybe you never should have domesticated your peeves."

"I think airlines should let you exit the plane on the inflatable slide on your birthday."

"Hey, we never talked in high school! Let's be Facebook friends so we can once again never talk! JUST LIKE OLD TIMES!"

"Why couldn't Hitler change a lightbulb? It was just out of his reich."

"I like my woman the way I like my coffee. Hot, black, and all over my lap while I'm driving."

"what is michael J. Fox's favourite beverage? a vanilla shake"

"Who did the pirate lose his virginity to? His first mate."

"New twist on an old joke (long) Don't know if this is the right place for this but I think fellow joke-lovers will think it's amazing. http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2013/11/18/guy-walks-into-a-bar"