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Joke of the Day

"Romantic cop: Here, I brought you a flower. Competitive about everything cop: Big deal. I brought you a flowest."

"I once dated a girl for 3 months because we were stuck in a hammock."

"What's an idealist vegetarian's favorite meal? Peas and hominy"

"How do you pick up my ex girlfriend? With a broom and a dustpan."

"What do you call a gay indian? A Brave Sucker Best friends dad coughed this one up to his son-in-law that was native american."

"among countless other horrible crimes the KKK also ruined the badass title of ""Grand Wizard"" for every other organization forever"

"Bears spend a bunch of time getting fat, sleep for a few months and then wake up skinny. Being a human is terrible."

"What did the seamen say to each other when they entered a deep dark cave? Smells fishy"

"What's blue and fucks grannies? Hypothermia."

"How many shrinks does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but the light bulb really has to want to change."