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Joke of the Day

"I was going to make a dubstep joke But I'll just drop it."

"When did razors get so expensive? Three more payments and I'll be able to shave"

"WIFE: I love you NEIL DEGRASSE TYSON: Actually it's just emotional comfort after years of being toget- WIFE: *packing* I'll be at my mothers"

"You know what they say about poorly produced pornography... You never see it coming."

"My company issues user id's to its new employees based on the 1st letter of their 1st name and the 1st 3 letters of their last name. I feel sorry for my new coworker Tim Watson."

"Everything always ends well. If not it's probably not the end."

"Pro tip: If a woman asks you how she looks, the correct answer is not ""like Dan Aykroyd."""

"I'm not saying let's go kill all the stupid people I'm just saying let's remove all the warning labels and let the problem sort itself out."

"Closed letter to the Mods of /r/Jokes O"

"Latvians don't know Fonz... ...they don't have happy days."