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Joke of the Day

"Earlier I joked that Toronto was the capital of Canada. ""Joked"" being the operative word. Everyone knows only real countries have capitals."

"Whats the best thing about dating a Cleveland Cavaliers fan? They never expect a ring"

"How can you tell when a Software Developer is an extrovert ? He looks at *your* shoes when he's talking to you."

"Knock knock ""Who's there?"" ""Dejav"" ""Dejav who?"" Knock knock"

"I wish Beyonce & Jay-Z would get on stage and present their baby to the world like Mufasa did in the Lion King."

"What do you call an imaginary color? A pigment of your imagination."

"*brings knife to gunfight* *knife used to cut pizza* *pizza served & differences resolved* *last slice up for grabs & gunfight ensues*"

"Amazon Prime Day."

"""Watch me smell my wine."" - white people"

"Why did the vampire stand at the bus stop with his finger up his nose? He was a ghoulsnif fer."