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Joke of the Day

"BOSS: I'm sorry I just don't trust your judgment. ME: [trying to pick up glass of water with both fists wedged in Pringles tubes] explain.."

"Why do feminists hate church music? Because of all the Hymns."

"I'm hungry but broke so I'm waiting for my bf to say he's hungry too than he'll order something delicious while I pretend to be indifferent."

"Some pretzels are totally weird... They're knot for eating."

"I think it's fun how Hollywood gets to make as many Superman movies as they want until they get it right."

"Q. What does CHAOS stand for? A.The Chiefs Have Arrived On Scene."

"Black Ice Slipped on ice today. Didnt know it was black ice until my wallet was gone."

"Me: did you know that abbreviating names can be really confusing? GF: really? Me: yeah George Foreman: that's interesting"

"joke what did the porcupine say the first time it had sex ? ouch ooh ouch ooh ouch ooh. what the beaver say the first time it had sex ?....... gee Wally that kind of hurt"

"Pedophile Kids who are scared of pedophiles really need to grow up."