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Joke of the Day
"*dims the lights so you look like your selfies*"
Next Joke
"Kids, don't do cocaine but if you do make sure you have a lot cuz you'll want it."
"A duck wearing a shoe walks into a bar The bartender says ""Hey Duck, I think you lost a shoe"" says the duck: ""No, I found one"""
"Coworker: I could care less! Me: How much less could you care? Coworker: I don't get it. Me: I noticed."
"Strong people don't put others down. They lift them up and body-slam them for maximum impact."
"What Pokemon would you catch in Rio De Janeiro? Zikachu."
"A man walks into a bar... He asks the barman ""do you serve women here?"" The barman replies ""no, sorry, you'll have to bring your own."""
"Why do elephants have flat feet? from jumpin' outta palm trees, duh"
"What's red and orange and looks great on hippies? Napalm"
"When I'm on a golf course and it starts to rain and lightning, I hold up my one-iron Because even God can't hit a one-iron"