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Joke of the Day

"Born again Christian I've never understood the term ""born again Christian."" Is that someone who goes to their mother and says, ""Mom, I'm going back in, and I'm not coming out until I've found Jesus."""

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"I always carry a small bottle of Tabasco when I fly. You never know when you're going to crash in the Alps & have to live by eating people."
"An apple a day keeps doctor away... ... so do the sticks and stones."
"Little Shop of Horrors should have taken place in Russia. Because in Soviet Russia plant eats you!"
"What's Blue and not heavy? Light Blue."
"Why shouldn't you get asylum in Russia? Cuz you'd be snowed-in"
"""That's what."" -She."
"What's worse than two babies in a dumpster? A baby in two dumpsters."
"Does any one know a program that converts mp3's into Nutella?"
"This girl text me: ""your adorable I text back: no YOU'RE adorable Now she likes me and I was just pointing out her typo..."