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Joke of the Day

"I won't undo a retweet in case someone finds it offensive. I just knit them onto pillows and give them as Christmas gifts."

Next Joke
 
"I feel bad for people who work at German supermarkets. They have to deal with Deutsch bags all day."
"Who should you pray to if you don't want the airplane that you are on to get diverted? Diversion Mary"
"I told my son I'm a motherfucker...... He was like. ""You fuck mothers...... lesbo."" I replied. "" Ain't a lesbo if it's myself."""
"What do you call an and with frogs legs ? An antphibian !"
"Someone just stole my lemon loaf.... Out of everything that happened today, they really took the cake"
"a short fortune teller escaped from prison she's now a small medium at large"
"Half life 3"
"What do you call a discounted circumcision? A rip off"
"Homeless people are so lucky. They don't have to pay rent and can eat as many pigeons as they want."