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Joke of the Day

"What did the old billy bobs eat at McDonald's? McChicken-killer... Yeah I'm really stoned smoked a chicken killer and ate McDonald's"

"*armadillo comes rolling back in the ball return* ""Wait.. if you're here, then..."" *cut to wife sobbing at bowling ball* ""UNCURL, FREDRICK!"""

"[loudly in front of a bunch of ducks] ""OH NO I SEEM TO HAVE BROUGHT TOO MUCH BREAD WITH ME WHATEVER SHALL I DO?"" *ducks try to play it cool*"

"What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair (credit to my physics teacher's wife)"

"Why was the communist school not successful? There were no classes"

"What's Forrest Gump's password? 1Forrest1"

"*Leonardo Dicapreo goes up to accept oscar* *pulls out speech* *blows dust off of it* Yes I'd like to thank the directors of titanic for th-"

"Did you hear about that Jew that started a charity? Neither did I."

"Lesbians should not be allowed to buy dildos, they made their choice!!"

"The best thing about being Bane has gotta be that he can just slice a hardboiled egg straight into his pie hole"