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Joke of the Day
"I told my boss you're a plank He asked ""why?"" I said ""Cuz you're a piece of ship"""
Next Joke
"One day a boy was answering all the questions right in class.... Girl: Wow, what a fucking nerd Teacher: Be nice, he might be your boss one day Boy: Nah, I don't ever plan on being a pimp"
"[bankruptcy court] JUDGE: Didn't you do any financial planning? ME: *lips pressed on mic* Yes, your Honor, I was planning on having finances"
"Which honorary degree is to be awarded to someone who has made contributions to PHP ? Ph.P."
"I bet women love the first dimension... It's allllllllllllllll length."
"My sex-life is like a Ferrari, I don't have a Ferrari"
"""Doctor I think I need glasses!"" ""You certainly do Sir, this is the butchers."""
"Do you know what happens when you eat too many wontons? You weigh wonton!"
"When my teacher wanted to see an example of a ringed molecule... I got my arsole out."
"Today I learned not all people are appreciative of vetriloquism. Especially my gynecologist."