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Joke of the Day

"Which honorary degree is to be awarded to someone who has made contributions to PHP ? Ph.P."

"A Physics teacher was talking about the velocity of a falling ball A student asked, ""Is it an African ball or an European ball?"""

"Did you see the new abortion movie? I hear it's a real coat hanger"

"Chinese Food: $16.72 Gas to Get to Restaurant: $1.94 Getting Home and Realizing They Forgot One of Your Food Containers: Riceless"

"Teacher : What's happens to gold when it is exposed to the air ? Pupil : It's stolen !"

"There are two types of people in this world: Those who need closure (told by Cortana)"

"Never take ecstasy with a squirrel named... hey, squirrel dude, what's your name? Charles? Never take ecstasy with a squirrel named Charles."

"Sometimes I yell at my stepladder, ""You're not my real ladder! You can't tell me what to do!"" And then I kick it. Feels good."

"I have Alzheimer's AMA (Not sure if repost) Yes, this is a x-post from /r/circlejerk, but still a pretty good joke in my opinion."

"Why is it so hard to build a blonde snowman? Because you have to hollow out the head."