166839

Joke of the Day

"Pharmacist: Don't take this while driving and make sure you eat- *crushes pill and snorts off the counter* ""Ok"""

"Fun game: Take pictures with your camera sound turned up when someone comes into the bathroom stall next to yours"

"What did the hat say to the scarf? You hang around, and I'll go on ahead."

"The best person to get thrown in jail with would have to be the Kool-Aid Man."

"Hockey: because running on knives makes sense."

"Why don't blondes like to make Kool-Aid? They can't get eight cups of water into that little packet."

"I'm still disappointed that Penguin and Random House merged to become Penguin Random House and not the more hilarious Random Penguin House."

"I bet all those girls that ignored me in high school would still be pretty pleased with that decision"

"An ironic joke walks into a bar, orders a beer, and sits down Bartender says hey! We're straight talkers here... no irony allowed. Ironic joke says well that's fine then, because I just want a beer."

"Shit old people Google: 1. Dubstep 2. Skrillrex 3. Hashtag 4. DTF 5. Steampunk 6. Pinterest 7. Linsanity 8. Scarlett Johansson naked"