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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a fat pirate? A vast matey."
Next Joke
"What time does Sean Connery go to Wimbledon? Tennish..."
"I just had a moment of clarity. Glad that's over with."
"[Parent-Teacher Conference] Teacher: ..if another kid is mean to her, she calmly walks away Me: *flips table* WHICH KID IS MEAN TO HER?!?!"
"Did you know that 1 in every doll, in every doll, in every doll, in every doll are Russian?"
"Two deer walk out of a bar. One turns to the other in disgust and says, ""I can't believe you blew 20 bucks in there."""
"How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? LET'S GO RIDE OUR BIKES!!"
"My guy hates waste, so we went to the store, picked out anniversary cards, exchanged them, read them, and put them back on the shelves."
"What's E.T. Stand for? Extra testicle"
"Why did.. Q : Why did Manchester United go to Stamford Bridge? A : Four Nothing"