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Joke of the Day

"[doctor hands wife urn] Ma'am, I'm afraid your husband didn't make it. ""Nooo!"" she cries. Oh, he's fine. But he didn't make this lovely urn."

"There's 26 letters in the English language, combined to make millions of words, which are used to make infinite sentences for any event imaginable. . . Yet I see the same jokes posted every day."

"What do you call a number that can't keep still? A roamin' numeral"

"Medical prices these days are ridiculous Why, something as simple as an amputation costs an arm and a leg."

"I want to be important enough to receive a phone call, say one word, hang up and having the end result being something blown up."

"The UK Government has decided to make LSD legal as a drug for weight loss It makes sense if you think about it. It's kinda hard to get to the fridge when there's a dragon guarding it..."

"Why was the lion-tamer fined ? He parked on a yellow lion !"

"Kim Kardashian's butt Q: What do you call the space between Kim Kardashian's breasts and butt cheeks? A: Silicon Valley."

"A friend told me this one. What's the difference between Windows 8.1 and Windows 10? The start menu."

"You guys wanna hear a miscarriage joke? Wait, it would probably come out wrong..."