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Joke of the Day

"I want to be important enough to receive a phone call, say one word, hang up and having the end result being something blown up."

"When you realize... The Ghostbusters (2016) budget was 153 million dollars. *facepalm*"

"What did Tennessee? The same thing as Arkansas"

"Condoms don't guarantee safe sex anymore..... A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband."

"Why should every woman know a C++ programmer? Because they'll always let friends access their private members. Ba dum tiss."

"What do you call a stoner balancing his checkbook? High finance!"

"What's the best part about abortions? They never get old"

"You know what they say when you go black.... ....you're raising that kid by yourself."

"It only took three beers before I could tell my kid her Barbie Dream House is in foreclosure. She's such a lightweight."

"Q: What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars? A: Tyrannosaurus wrecks!"