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Joke of the Day

"I want transition lenses that turn black whenever someone starts talking to me."

"What is the TSA's favorite movie? Inspection."

"[swipes debit card] *would you like cash back?* yes [gazes at photo in wallet of steve jobs johnny cash & bob hope, whispers] yes i would"

"What do you call a doctor who eats his vegetables? A cannibal."

"Whats the difference between a zit and a priest? (My 17 year old camper just said this, made me cringe) A zit waits till you're a teenager to come on your face."

"A guy died while having sex He came and went"

"Yall wanna hear a joke? Women's rights."

"IHTGYATSWTFIM = I had to Google your acronym to see what the fuck it meant."

"Keep away from professional dermatologists.. They make rash decisions"

"What's the difference between a lazy overeater and a flirtatious emo? One is Sloth the Gluttonous the other is Goth the Sluttiness. Yep made that up on the way home today... Sorry."