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Joke of the Day
"I may not show up to work on time, but dammit I leave early."
Next Joke
"A vegan girl told me that, ""If you eat beef, you're basically a velociraptor."" In what world is that not totally awesome."
"It takes balls to be a man."
"My favorite episode of Friends is the one where blacks mysteriously vanish and unemployed white people find affordable housing in Manhattan."
"A Poem Roses are red, Violets are blue, Stop memes about Harambe -Cincinnati Zoo"
"If buttered toast always lands buttered side down and a cat always lands on its feet what would happen if you tied a pice of buttered toast on the back of a cat and dropped it?"
"Cop failed me on the sobriety test even tho I not only touched my nose like he asked but went on & totally nailed the rest of the macarena."
"What do you get ...when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?"
"You guys hear that Bono fell off the stage at the big U2 concert last night? He got a little too close to the edge."
"You know what really grinds my gears? When I shift into third without using the clutch."