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Joke of the Day

"If buttered toast always lands buttered side down and a cat always lands on its feet what would happen if you tied a pice of buttered toast on the back of a cat and dropped it?"

"What do you call a urinary tract infection caused in a virgin? Immaculate Infection"

"If I was a roofer I'd go around saying I'm single and ready to shingle."

"What do you say when you are comforting a grammar nazi? There, Their, They're"

"What do you call a Mexican on a bike? a dirt bike"

"Why did the gifting company fire their last employee ? Because they got a bad wrap."

"Today, I'm gonna dig up the time capsule I buried when I was a kid. I can't wait to see how big my puppy's gotten."

"Went to the doctors yesterday, suffering from premature ejaculation... ... doctor said, ""This must be very stressful for your wife"". I replied, ""To be honest, it's getting on her tits""."

"""I always feel so self-conscious when I'm out in public,"" I told my girlfriend. ""Don't worry, you aren't that ugly,"" she sniggered. I said, ""No, but you are."""

"What do you call a snail on a ship? A snailor."