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Joke of the Day

"My daughter said she was in a memoir. I was intrigued until I realized what she said was meme war. Whatever tickles your fancy, Love."

"I was at a posh resturaunt last night but the pianist was awful He just kept playing bottom C over and over. Really lowered the tone."

"Ever have the shower curtain touch you unexpectedly and start karate chopping the air?? No, me either."

"Why do pigs love Halloween? There's lots of hogsgobblin."

"Does anyone else love thick sandwiches with three slices of bread and two layers of filling? We should make a club."

"There is so much lead in Flint That when you pass a factory, you immediately assume that Chinese children work there"

"I'm obsessed with you. Not like peak through your window obsesseHEY I LIKE THAT DRESS WEAR THAT ONE"

"Did you hear about the cheese that exploded? There was debrie everywhere."

"What's grey and comes in quarts? An elephant"

"What happens when someone mixes Francium, Oxygen, Tungsten, and Nitrogen after it explodes? The chemist may frown."