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Joke of the Day
"I got a papercut writing my suicide note. It's a start. -Steven Wright"
Next Joke
"If shit was music, you'd be an orchestra."
"Yeah, cigarettes make you cool but they also take years off your life. Those are just two benefits."
"Q: How did Bill and Hillary Clinton meet? A: They were dating the same girl in high school."
"I put a Samsung Galaxy Note 7 inside a Samsung washing machine and now I own a nuclear warhead."
"TIL there is a new type of morning-after pill, and it's for men! It changes blood type."
"On Canada Day, I like to say ""HAPPY CANADA DAY!"" to people. But quietly. And from a distance. I don't want to be a bother."
"Q) What do you call a group of 8 rabbits? A) Rabbyte!"
"Which three American Generals won the most during the cold war? General Motors, General Electric, and General Dynamics."
"5 missed calls from my mom. Frantically called her back, expecting tragedy; nope, wallets are on sale at Kohl's."