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Joke of the Day

"Q: How is a penis like fishing? A: The small ones you throw back the medium ones you eat and the larger ones you mount."

"What did you call beef that didn't make the cut a miSTEAK"

"If I hear another conversation about that stupid dress... I'm going to beat them until they're white and gold."

"Why does it take so long for pirates to learn the alphabet They could spend years at Sea!"

"Used to hate red lights before text messaging was invented."

"I buy every comic book I see. . . My friends say I have lots of issues."

"How Britons shower. The same as you, dummy. First, we get nice and wet. Then we get the tea."

"How do you discuss cheese with a Welshman? Very Caerphilly."

"My answer to everything today will be FUCK YOU, I'M AN ANTEATER!"

"If a mother and her son conceived a child, what would the child call his/her mother? ""Herrburgggerrrpffffppphfffffdudududeck"""