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Joke of the Day

"There's a serial killer in our house! Normal people: ""CALL THE POLICE, LETS GET OUT OF HERE!"" - In movies: ""Lets go find him"" -___-"

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"As a guy, wearing Crocs is a lot like getting a blowjob from another man... It feels great until you look down and realize you're a homo."
"How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowplow? Get the bitch a shovel."
"My parrot got himself a new suit. It's polly ester."
"What is the longest word in the English language? Nina: What is the longest word in the English language? SoSA: SMILES: becoz there is a mile between the first and last letters!"" :P"
"I bet Lady Gaga covers herself in glue and just rolls around in random objects."
"""I'm sorry, is this your wallet?"" poapoale&&2&22222"
"The only chance of me reaching the third base ever... ...is while playing baseball"
"What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Juan on juan"
"What do you call a group of Idiots? Congress"