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Joke of the Day

"You can park your car anywhere you want as long as you turn on your emergency blinkers. It's one of the more obscure lifehacks out there"

"I just ate what I thought was a feta cheese crumble from my salad off my shirt. Turns out it was deodorant. So how's your day going?"

"Two women want to form a project group... Turns out it was a real misfit."

"""Just do it!"" Why Nike reps don't man the suicide hotlines."

"Me: bedtime! Brain: you're hungry M: no I'm not B: thirsty then M: nope B: uhh sad? M: doing ok B: you forgot to do that thing M: nice try"

"If only Africa had more mosquito nets... then every year we could save millions of mosquitoes from dying needlessly of AIDS."

"Can women pay for a Brazilian wax with defurred payments? Not if they are Bush Supporters."

"How do you make a little girl cry twice. You rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear."

"You take away the looks, money, intelligence, charm and success and, really, there's no real difference between me and George Clooney."

"""Beatles or Stones?"" I asked my son. ""Why can't we have something normal for dinner?"" He said"