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Joke of the Day

"If only Africa had more mosquito nets... then every year we could save millions of mosquitoes from dying needlessly of AIDS."

"What's the difference between a Porsche and a KIA? Paul Walker wouldn't be caught dead in a KIA."

"Alright Ralphs, here's the deal: you replace people with automated cashiers, I replace paying with stealing produce."

"I dated a woman once. Most confusing twenty minutes of my life."

"THANKSGIVING ICEBREAKERS: (1) Obama, am I right? (2) Ebola, am I right? (3) Was his full name Bugs Bunny or was he just a bunny named Bugs?"

"APOLLO: I'll be god of the sun HERMES: OK I'll take light- A: I'm also light ARTEMIS: I'll take music A: No I'm also music. That's me too"

"Why are gay pride parades held in the summer? Because gay pride comes before gay fall."

"What did the train on the way to Auschwitz say? JEW JEW! TUGATUGATUGATUGA JEW JEW!"

"Frequently Asked Questions: 1) You did what? 3) How dare you? 53) Don't you know how numbering lists works?"

"What did the guy say when he finally earned the top spot on the High Scores list at the Masturbate Arcade? ""I BEAT IT!!!"""