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Joke of the Day

"I don't like guys who only make periodic chemistry jokes at parties. I usually ask those Mendeleev."

"Animals are more careful than human. Here is the reason. http://funnyentry.com/ny-pizza-rat-turns-to-cannibalism/"

"Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible? A. Honda...because the apostles were all in one Accord."

"What's in a name? A rose by any other name would smell as sweet. But, if roses were called ""herpes"" they'd make terrible Valentine's Day gifts."

"It doesn't matter if I go to church or the gym as long as I can act superior later, right?"

"How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them"

"Have you heard of the book about airplane factories? It's riveting."

"Did you hear what happened when Oedipus got flu? He became one sick mother fucker."

"How do you give a blonde two black eyes and a broken nose without touching her by waving your cock under a glass table"

"Roses are red, my real name is Dave. This poem makes no sense, microwave."