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Joke of the Day
"My therapist says I'm narcissistic. How can someone who's perfect be narcissistic?"
Next Joke
"Why is it bad that Peyton Manning shilled for Budweiser? Because he clearly owed the win to Miller."
"What's similar between you mom and a bottle of Tide detergent? They can both take about 65 loads."
"What do you call a gay chemist? Homogeneous."
"I said ""Candyman"" 5 times into the bathroom mirror and sure enough some woman came out of the stall and screamed at me for being in there."
"I'll bet you $46,368.86 you can't guess how much I owe my Bookie."
"A heavy metal fan walks into a heavy metal bar. He gets a concussion."
"Why does everyone like the KKK? Cause they're the best!"
"2 dyslexics robbing a bank. Two dyslexics run into a bank and shout: Air in the hands mother stickers this is a fuck up."
"I was walking in the desert and saw a redwood tree. I knew this must be a mirage, so I ran into it. To my dismay, the tree and I collided. I guess it must have been an obstacle illusion."