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Joke of the Day

"Waiter: I'm sorry I spilled a glass of water on you. Diner: That's all right. My suit is too large anyway."

"What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit Farts"

"Why would you wrap a hamster in duct tape? So it doesn't explode when you're fucking it."

"[Barnes and Noble] CASHIER: anything else? ME: four barns and your finest noble please CASHIER: get out"

"I like to use the Ouija board to pester my dead husbands."

"My grandmother reads obituary column in the newspaper everyday. It is pretty much like searching for your childhood friends on Facebook."

"How do you get a nun pregnant? Dress her up like a choir boy"

"R Kelly taking the art out of rap artist."

"I tried growing some thin fruit last month But there's been slim pickings."

"Did you hear about the skinny guy that visited Alaska? I guess he came back a husky fucker."