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Joke of the Day

"History exam Today during history exam, I got a question about the Spanish Inquisition. I wasn't expecting that."

"At the police station a) Somebody stole my wallet. b) When did this happen ? a) I don't know he also stole my watch."

"How did Godzilla escape the trains? He threw them off their tracks."

"[at dentist] so your X-rays look grea- *phone rings* hold on *on phone* a new engine? jesus, ok so as I was saying you have several cavities"

"What's the best form of protection when you don't have a condom? A fake name"

"I made a huge mistake I took my girlfriend to Subway, when she got her six inch sub, she looked at me and she instantly knew that I've been lying to her for years."

"What do you get when you combine 99 lesbians and a politician? 100 people that don't do dick"

"jokes jokes What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend? About 45 pounds. What's the differece between a husband and a boyfriend? 45 minutes"

"Marriage is like a seesaw. It's not fun if one of them is fat."

"I walked in the closet. I'm officially a straight man."