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Joke of the Day

"How do you fit 25 Jews in a car? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, and 20 in the ashtray"

"How can you tell if a potato is baked? It's [eyes](http://i.imgur.com/KwCyY.jpg) are all red and glossy."

"I hate Russian dolls. They're so full of themselves."

"Violinists are so brave. They fret not."

"What did the philosophically-wise Mongol general say to motivate himself? I'm not Immanuel Kant. I'm Genghis Kahn!"

"If Mary Poppins floated in on an umbrella today, they'd shoot her out of the sky with a drone."

"Hitting on women at this PTA meeting would probably be easier if I actually had a kid at this school."

"I just witnessed a co worker eat a cupcake with no frosting. What kind of devil worshiping nonsense is this?"

"I don't hold grudges or plot for revenge, I will simply send a bunch of Jehovah's witnesses to your door...on a daily basis."

"Yo mama is so fat...that when she wore a blue and green sweatereveryone thought she was Planet Earth"