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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between a pitbull and a Golden Retriever? A Golden Retriever can sing better."

"All of Hitlers generals were having a cookout, why wasn't Hitler invited? He always burnt the franks."

"Harry Potter wouldn't leave me alone. I told him to Quidditch. I'll see myself out."

"My football playing cousin went to prison He went in as a tight end, and came out as a wide receiver."

"Aw look he's about to say his first words! ""Say dada!"" *baby opens mouth* Here it comes! *airhorn noise*"

"Paedophiles always have a certain look about them... Paedophiles always have a certain look about them, what is it about a beard and glasses that kids find so sexy?"

"Why did the grain call his sister ""momma""? Because he was in bread!"

"Whose elbows are ashier than everyone else's? The Jews."

"I Can't Believe I Don't Get More Recognition For Being Really Modest"

"Leading up to the wedding (NAME) has been on a whiskey diet. His lost three days already."